Thursday, August 30, 2007

Long Live The King

This afternoon, I don't know why, I began to hum the tune to this song in my mind. Over and over, particular phrases of the melody repeated themselves. Finally, I pulled out my earbuds and turned on my iTunes and listened to the song in its entirety.

While the melody caught my ear, the lyrics, I discovered, had caught my heart. It spoke to me in the weariness and exhaustion of the day to day, the pain and worry of my mother's battle with cancer, and the joy I find in knowing I am held where nothing can harm me, in the palm of His hand. This song is the prayer of my life, at the moment.

Enjoy.


***NOTE: I found Aaron's own lyric notes with references he listed line by line. Even more powerful! ***

"Long Live The King"
From: Whispered and Shouted
Artist: Aaron Shust

My heat keeps beating even though I can’t control it
My lungs keep breathing; I admit I don’t know how [Job 14:5]
Bring the flood or bring the fire in this lifetime
I’m ready for the altar or the plough [Luke 22:31-34]

There are always days when I don’t feel like singing
There are always days when I don’t care at all [Psalm 42]
But I know the King of All Creation reigns completely
Over every moment great and small

Long live the One who gives us
Life and peace and hope for tomorrow [Jeremiah 29:11]
You’ve given everything we needed
From the palm of Your hand [Hebrews 1:3]
I’ll give my life to the One
Who pledged to cancel my sorrow [Revelation 21:4]
All I have is Yours Long Live the King [Revelation 19:15-17]

Humbly we approach Your throne of Mercy [Esther 4:11]
Aware that we’re unworthy of Your Grace [Romans 3:23]
But You have offered pardon and forgiveness [Esther 5:2]
Grievances are gone without a trace [Psalm 103:12]

You restore our lives even though we don’t deserve it
And You’ve given us a love that’s not our own [I John 4:7]
You assemble all our broken, shattered pieces
More beautiful than I had ever known [Colossians 1:18-20]

You shall reign forever and ever
You shall reign, You shall reign
Forever and ever and ever and ever and ever [Revelation 11:15]

Q O' D

"If you don't see me here, I'm at the beach!"

-Ruby Red

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

I Need Destin

Oh, how I need the soothing sound of the ocean, accompanied by several days of nothing but down time. My body is exhausted. My mind is exhausted. My heart is burdenend. My soul is weary.

Ironically, despite all of those things, I really am in a good place. I am just so ... tired. I've been pushing myself mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and physically for a couple of months now, and it is really starting to show. In some ways, this is a blessing! I've been more consistent with my walk with the Lord, I've seen good friends turn into amazing sister-friends, I've taken on more responsibilities at work, I've lost a little weight, and I've stepped outside of my comfort zone.

Now, I just need to "be still and know" for awhile. Just a little while. Just enough to reboot, recharge, renew.

For the space of five days, no wondering "what ever happened to him?", no hearing answering the "you have a call on 101" pages, no worrying about the client who likes to ask me "well, why can't you do that? It's so simple. Let me talk to your designer. I can tell them what to do," and no 45-minute commuting!

*sigh*

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

This Stinks

I woke up at 4:30am today and couldn't go back to sleep. So, I did what any normal girl would do. I got up.

And went to work.

Barely 6:15, and I'm sitting in my cubicle. How pathetic is that?

Monday, August 27, 2007

Q O' D

(Quote of the Day)

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work."

-Thomas Edison

-----
Every day at work, I put a new quote up on my whiteboard that faces the hallway. It's become expected of me ... if my coworkers don't see a new one, they ask me when I'm going to put it up. This is today's. I really like it!

Dissapointment

Things I don't want to happen, do, and things I do want to happen, don't.

That's life.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

One Week Until Destin!!!

I just realized that, as of today, I have only one week until my friends and I leave for Destin, FL over Labor Day weekend. Having not been to the ocean since I was 18 (nine years ago, but who's counting?), I am very, very excited.

We are packing up the van next Thursday evening after work and heading out into the night. We plan on arriving Friday morning, crashing for a few hours to catch up on whatever sleep we didn't get while on the road, and then relaxing at the condo or on the beach for the rest of the weekend.

We're all pretty laid back, so I don't think we'll do much site-seeing. The primary purpose of the trip is to be a Bible study retreat for my church's singles' group, but we'll probably also watch some movies, play board games, and eat out a few times. I do believe dominos will be involved at one point or another. Trust me—with my friends, that alone will take HOURS. We take our dominos seriously.

Now to go make my packing list ...

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Water is Viscous

Viscosity.

What a great word. It's fun to say, and it's even scientific! I love viscosity, don't you? It is so tenacious ... yet another great word. Water clinging to water. Molecules acting as a single unit that flows and pours and molds itself into whatever container it occupies. It never holds back.

I'm not sure, but I think there might be a metaphor for life in that.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

31 Things That Make Me Happy

1. Blank composition notebooks
2. Genuine compliments
3. Checking off my "To Do" list check boxes
4. Odd year ages (17, 21, 25, and 27 were all good)
5. Extra Fine tipped COLOR Sharpies
6. Expensive brands of water and their classy bottles (Currently, I'm drinking "G Beneath the Rainbow" from Scotland. Its bottle is absolutely scrumptious, and award-winning to boot)
7. Guys that wear screen-printed t-shirts under sport coats and with jeans.
8. Jane Austen--nuff' said.
9. Dark chocolates from an independent gourmet chocolatier
10. The smell of a book store
11. 6am Starbucks runs for Grande Caramel Lattes before work
12. Purse shopping
13. SEPHORA stores
14. The sounds of a rain storm
15. Walking my dog
16. Boating on a lake
17. iTunes
18. Dad hugs
19. Text messages from friends during work hours
20. Flip flops
21. Air conditioning in my "new" car
22. Flying
23. Random quotations
24. Sitting by a babbling brook with my eyes closed and just ... listening.
25. Automatic car washes
26. Children's laughter
27. Flea Market antiques
28. Pedicures!
29. Sunshine and a breeze
30. A job well done
31. New friends

Monday, August 20, 2007

2 Posts, 1 Day, 4 Real

After two months of nothingness, writing two posts in one day seems excessive, but somehow I don't care because somehow I have this incredibly complex universe of thoughts flying around in my head at the speed of, well, thought. Which means I'm pondering things again. Which means I have a lot to figure out. Which means I'll probably have enough to say to fill up way more than a mere two posts per day.

So, there.

Life has this wonderful way of creeping up on me and then jumping out from behind the nearest bush while yelling, "BOO!" Aaa! I didn't see you there, Life. Where ya been?

I've been focusing all of my energy on the upkeep of relationships lately, and it has begun to drain me. I've been tired--more tired than I should be, actually. I am not saying I will for one second stop focusing my attention on the wonderful people around me. I am only saying that I have had to stop and take a few deep breaths and say a few deep prayers in order to have the strength to recharge. It's like I have batteries that have been drained, and my system has sloooowwwwwwed down in order to conserve energy.

What's been going on in the lives of people I care about for the past few months? Break-ups. Make-ups. Birthdays. Job hunts. House hunts. Engagements. Weddings. Family trips. Phone tag. Chemo treatments. Births. Spritual awakenings. Heartaches. Tests. Car troubles. Money troubles. Work troubles. Girl/Guy troubles. In other words: LIFE.

Rain

What a blessing! It finally rained last night here in Middle Tennessee. I wish it would rain more ... our poor crops and fields and lawns are thirsty.

I was outside walking my dog as the lightening approached from the distance. There's something exhilarating about feeling the wind pick up, seeing the flashes of bold, white light, and hearing the low rumble of thunder grumbling as it approaches. The air seems crisper and I always feel more aware of the enormity of the Earth and, in a small way, the awe of knowing that God has formed nature to do amazing things, from the cellular to the universal level. Every little part works together to form a whole that is, quite simply, incomprehensible.

That's a lot to ponder from just a few raindrops.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Back Again

I realized today that life had been so busy that I hadn't journaled online in a very, very long time. Such a shame, considering how much I love to ramble.

So, quick update ...


GOOD STUFF:

- Job is going well, and I enjoy it for the most part. I've hit the busiest season of our year, in which I will have to live, breathe, and think "Catalog Season," that faster-than-the-speed of light time when we pump out more than 80 custom catalogs with over 200 custom pages in less than four months. Ahh, the insanity.

- Dog is good. Still acting puppyish out of pure joy since becoming a house pet. You'd never know she's a grumpy middle-aged woman in dog years.

- Got a raise.

- Got a NEW CAR!!!! YAY!!!

- Hair is a different color. Got highlights, and like it a lot. Don't think I'll go back.

- And, on a random note, it is ALMOST the one-year anniversary of my breaking my right foot, my car tags expiring and then failing emissions so I can't get new ones, and my car breaking down, all within two or three weeks of each other.


BAD STUFF:

- Still struggling with paying off debt. It is an impossible hampster wheel of activity from within a prison cell.

- Mom's cancer has stopped responding to her current regimen, and is now spreading, growing at a pace that is frightening. I keep praying for God to heal her and give her strength. Sometimes, I am ashamed I forget about her illness while I'm busy with my life. Other times, I am so overwhelmed with pain and sorrow that I don't know what to do. But I am so enormously grateful that she has made it this far. Was it only last October that she was diagnosed?