Heart Still Pounding

I was driving home from a shopping excursion about 10 minutes ago, when I noticed a strange change in the near-black darkness surrounding my car. It looked like a rectangular piece of the night sky above the mini-van in front of me had turned brownish and was spinning toward me.

I slammed on the brakes and swerved onto the shoulder as a sheet of plywood, which would have hit my windshield head-on, flew at me, narrow end first. As it was, after swerving, it missed me by only a foot on the driver's side.

I was shaking the rest of the way home.

Miranda Meets a Guy

OK . . . so he was her older brother's best friend in high school, whom she barely remembered.

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Word Count: 11,399/50,000
Sanity: 99%, actually
Food I'm Craving RIGHT NOW: a big, fat, juicy hamburger.

Think Pink!

I should be asleep, as it is 12:55 a.m. and I must go and work in the kitchen eight hours from now.

Really, NaNoWriMo, I love you, but you are awfully dangerous for a girl who works so early in the morning with sharp pointy objects!

Ahhh, well. See what I mean about my creative zucchini? It grows and grows at night, and I can't stop! Must sleep! The zucchini will be there in the morning, you dingbat! (pardon my letterpress language).

Anywho: Miranda Celeste has had an epiphany. It involves the color pink, and she is about to try to take it into international fame.

----
Word Count: 8,800/50,000
Sanity: 82.3%
Number of Jelly Bellies Eaten: At least 25. I think. Yay for Buttered Popcorn!

The Creative Zucchini

Sometimes, ya'll, I seriously feel like a squash plant. Zucchini, to be precise.

Yeah, yeah, I hear you. "Do what???!"

No, I am not going insane. I am merely illustrating a point. My mother had a garden years ago in which she planted a whopping 4 zucchini plants. That doesn't sound so bad now, does it? I mean, we had something around 15 tomato plants, but only 4 zucchini.

We only really needed 1/2 of a zucchini plant, for they are the most prolific plants on the planet, or so it seemed. We ate zucchini bread, zucchini muffins, zucchini pancakes ... you name it, we had it. (Did I mention I despise zucchini to this day?)

The thing is, despite the fact that you could LITERALLY have zero zucchini one day and about a dozen or so the next, you never saw the little green buggers coming. If you were patient enough ... reeeeaaaalllly patient ... you probably could watch a zucchini grow overnight, but for the rest of us it was like magic. Poof! Zucchini!

That's what creativity is like. A little bit goes a long way and even though it requires a great deal of patience and effort, it appears like magic overnight--a mysterious and mystical zucchini of inspiration. The hard part is filtering out the excess inspiration. Unlike those zucchinis, I hate to see any go to waste, but if I try to work it all into my life, I become overwhelmed.

Must. Plot. Book.

Five days into NaNoWriMo and I am beginning to lose steam. I have a general idea where the story is heading, but the way I write best is when I know the complete ending ahead of time and write toward that . . . otherwise I'm just floundering around in words.

So, Sunday I'm going to work out the specifics and then I hope that I'll shoot out another 4,000 words. Aarrrgggh! According to the NaNo people, I need to have 10,002 words by tomorrow evening in order to be right on schedule.

So, a little Miranda Celeste update here . . . today she went out to lunch with her best office friend and they comiserated about their boss over some great Italian food, but MC isn't letting her friend know just how much she is frustrated by her job right now. She wants out. She wants something big, but she's not sure what.

Well, that's where the 22 Incredibly Easy Ways to Become Famous come in. And folks, I'm afraid that's all I can say at the moment! (Publishers frown upon having too much revealed about plot . . . even by the author).

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Word Count: 6,103/50,000
Sanity: 94.3%
Sleep: I'm only gonna get 5 hours tonight. That's what Sunday-after-church naps were invented for!

Double Discount Days

I just saved over $97 at the Big Retail Store during our employee Double Discount Days. Like I joked with the store manager a couple of weeks ago, I don't know why I even bothered to pick up my paycheck today. It pretty much all went back to the store, since I was saving up to get a much-need fall wardrobe boost.

So what if I don't have health insurance--I've got purchasing power!

My favorite buys: two dress coats (one black, one camel), two big-button cardigans (one cream one pink), a big brown purse, and new-word-a-day calendar for 2006. I'm big on learning cool new words!

5,000 hits and counting!

Yee-hawww ... ruby red begins has had 5,000 visitors since February. Now, I know there are blogs out there that probably get that many in one day, but for little ol' me it's a super fantabulous number!

Now to figure out how to celebrate ...

Back to Business

You wouldn't know from reading this blog lately that it started out as a way to chronicle my journey into being a small business owner. It's funny how life gets in the way, huh?

Lately, I've been getting tired just by thinking about my start-up. I love ... adore ... working on designs and making beautiful/interesting products, but I get so worn out trying to think of ways to finance the venture. I'd only need, by my estimations, about $5-10k to do pretty much everything I was intending to do, but that is a steep sum for someone like me who is lucky to have an extra $20 in her wallet to buy a hamburger and fries with!

So I've been procrastinating, assuring myself that now that I'm used to the flow of work from my two jobs, I'll start working on initializing my plans in my "free" time.

Then, you know, I go and sign up for a crazy novel writing competition this month!!! I'm glad I did, and writing for a living has always been another serious goal of mine, but it still does take away that mere 2-3 hours I manage to squeeze out of my days somehow.

Ahhhh ... life.

p.s. Paperpreneurs is back!!! I now have accountability once more. This is good. This is very, very good.

22 Incredibly Easy Ways to Become Famous

That I've done any of them ... but that's the title of my NaNoWriMo book.

It's chick-lit, which some people despise, but I secretly enjoy, as long as it is clean overall and uplifting in the end. I promise, should this book ever find its way into the public eye, you will not be depressed, frustrated, or bored by the exploits of Miranda Celeste, 26, a young professional who is depressed, frustrated, and bored with her predictable and unremarkable career and life.

Today she raided the company supply cabinet for a computer screen-wipe-thing. You know what I mean. That fingerprint was distracting--she couldn't get any work done, obviously, with a fingerprint there.

Word Count: About 531/50,000.
Sanity: 99.5%

blue

While mopping up today after everyone else had left at the tea room, I felt the tears come uninvited. I ended up leaning against the broken freezer and just crying for awhile until the sadness passed enough to keep working.

I have some unresolved dissapointments, weary heartaches, and maybe some left over bitterness and anger that I have not felt comfortable posting about, but their combined effect after the past year or so have left me suddenly weak. I have good hopes for the issues to be taken care of in the coming weeks and months, but, meanwhile, the pain is still there, trying desperately to heal. I will probably always have a faint scar to remember this time of my life by, but I trust that God will work it out for good, no matter how badly it feels right now.

Countdown to NaNoWriMo

Two days, 3 hours until NaNoWriMo . . .

Who: Me and the thousands of other folks at National Novel Writing Month
What: Write a Novel in 30 Days (to the minute!)
When: 12:00 a.m. November 1 - 12:00 a.m. November 30
Where: Anywhere.
Why: To know I can.
To What Extent: 50,000 words or more!

I'm only allowed to prepare plot outlines and notes. Every word of the novel must be written between the allotted times in order to count. More to come on this venture!!!

breakouts

I have a constellation on my forehead. It somewhat resembles the Big Dipper if you tilt your head the right way to look at it.

My Dipper is revolving around the South Star on my chin.

Tag! I'm "It"!

Didn't know I was an "it" girl until last night. I've never been and "it girl" before. Thanks, Hi-Heeled Hotties and AccidentalJulie!

So, the gist of the game is that I'm supposed blog about 20 things I've not mentioned online (or at least not here) before. That's a tall order, but I'll do my best. Here's the twenty on me that you may (or may not) want to know:

1. When I was in 6th grade, I wanted to be a nurse. Fortunately for patients everywhere, I quickly came to my senses.

2. Then again, if I could be any profession I wanted outside of the creative field, I'd be a forensic pathologist . . . if only I could get my gag reflex under control.

3. I've met former president, and fellow Tennessean, Andrew Johnson (you know, the first one to be impeached). Okay, okay . . . so I've only visited his grave. But that's the closest I've ever been to a national leader, dead or alive.

4. I absolutely, positively, and irrevocably detest peas and lima beans. (Sorry, Pinky!)

5. When I was 5, I wanted to legally change my name to Crystal. Until I met one who was mean.

6. I'm arachnophobic. This is a fancy way of saying that I make other people squish spiders for me.

7. Nancy Drew used to be one of my heros, though I never understood her attraction to Ned. All the guy seemed to do was play football (see #12).

8. I collect snowmen (or snow people, to be politically correct).

9. I can eat an entire box of Peeps (the original yellow ones) without a trace of guilt.

10. Speaking of candy, I love dark chocolate, but not milk chocolate, unless, of course, the milk chocolate has been imported from Belgium or Switzerland, in which case it is always yummy!

11. I can never bring myself to wear bright orange. This is a slight problem when you live in the land of the Vols.

12. Also, I don't understand football.

13. So I should probably be banished from Tennessee.

14. I love good folk, world, celtic, and bluegrass/Americana music.

15. Unlike most girls I know, I don't really like to talk on the phone.

16. I catered banquets in college. You would not believe the messes people make at dinner time!

17. I can't stand the font Comic Sans. Okay . . . so I've sort of blogged about that before, but it bears repeating. This is an intervention! Stop the Comic InSANity!

18. I envy figure skaters, gymnasts, and TV newscasters for their effortless poise and ability to spring back from devestating errors with grace and dignity.

19. When I was a camp counselor, one of my darling campers told me I look like Ann Hathaway. If only!

20. I have a Bachelor of Science degree in Mass Communication with minors in Art and Writing. I graduated Magna Cum Laude. *toot, toot!* (that's my own proud horn you're hearing there).

------

and one more as a freebie . . .

21. Like most of us, I am entirely too fascinated with the topic of me. Even the fact that I have a personal blog in the first place only serves to verify this. I wish I could be a much more others--centered person. Perhaps go help some hurricane or earthquake victims. Do something real for others.

One day, one day, I WILL.

------

I tag Kathy and Stefani!!! Because I miss them, I tag my good friends Mel and Bex. Oh, and why not, PilotBob, consider yourself tagged, too. Just 'cause you're my brother doesn't mean you're safe from "it"!

I think my coffin needs resizing

Couldn't resist when I saw this at the theme park. I almost couldn't keep a straight face while the picture was taken. See? I think there's a little smirk on my corpse-like face.

incoherent ramblings

tired. so tired. working too much, think i. money hard to come by, know i.

despite that . . .

bought a cheap espresso maker yesterday. ground the coffee too fine and it didn't foam the milk after (steam all gone). go figure.

it's cold in tennessee now. chilly brrrrr. also bought zoe-girl a cute, cute sweater that she is wearing right now. she looks so cute in it! we went strutting the subdivision earlier, just after i came home from work. i might not turn heads, but she does, every time.

editing book. it's a difficult process to chop up my favorite phrases and lines and remold them into different, albeit better, combinations.

wondering if i ever will be a real, true business owner. it seems so mysteriously far away from the present.

oh, and christmas is two months away. to the day.

handmade or printed?

So I'm planning my personal Christmas cards for this year. I was originally going to try to have them 4-color printed and sell the extras, but I don't really have the money for that.

I also had considered printing postcards for my own list, but I don't have 200 people to send it to, and I'd like to do Christmas letter. That said, the postcard idea is the cheapest to both print and mail, and it's unique (how many christmas postcards did you get last year???) I also have the acrylics and paper to paint an original piece, scan, and create the card in Photoshop.

Of course, I could always do the postcard as a novelty to anyone who I've got an address for, and the letter separately to close friends.

Then again, I also like the idea of a gift book card . . . a handmade card with red stock that wraps around and is tied with a bow, with a story and misc. tidbits inside. They'd be more time-consuming, and not cheap to make, but, in the end, would be a tres elegant item!

On my bookshelf, in my players . . .

Currently reading:
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Douglas Adams
Blue Like Jazz, Don Miller

Currently listening:
Why Should the Fire Die? Nickel Creek
Enchantment, Charlotte Church

Have Watched Recently:
Pride & Prejudice (A & E)
Jumanji

proof that I am one unusual chick

Seriously. I was very excited to buy these books on medieval life, the italian renaissance, and how civilations have utilized fire. I got them at my favorite used bookstore in Knoxville, TN--McKay's. None of them was over $3.00.

Granted, they're research for a book I'm writing. But I must say that the only other person I know who might be as excited as I am about my bargain purchase is a former English professor I had in college.

I'm officially old

So, at work I overhear my manager and a couple of other girls discussing life and high school (they went to school together), and I am appalled to discover that people "older" than them graduated in 2000.

And then, to seal the deal, they mention being 2-years-old in 1987. . .

I stopped what I was doing and stared (in horror). TWO???!!!!! I said as much to them.

"Why," they ask, all innocent and everything. "How old were you?"

"Ummm. Seven." They confer amongst themselves to see what difference in age that makes between them and me.

"Wow. You're that old? We had no idea!"

Which, I suppose, is a type of compliment, all things considered. But, later on in the evening, one of the youngest girls confides to me that she has always hoped to be married by the time she was, as she says to me, "your age . . . which gives me about six years to find a guy and get engaged."

So now I'm old and an old maid!

t-shirt designs

OK, so they're not exactly stationery, but, as a graphic designer, I can hardly ignore t-shirts. And I have a GREAT idea for them. It's a niche market (book lovers/literary types) and I'm just chock full of designs and catch phrases.

yours truly, circa 1988

This is me as the clown for my brother's 5th (I think) birthday. All together now ... Awww! I think the white makeup wore off around my cheeks and lips because I kept itching it during the party.

Looking back, I realize I had a great tan back then . . . and it was September! I'm jealous of myself.

more evidence of my bizarre sense of humor

I haven't had the time to read this, but I found the title immensly amusing, and the content so full of my favorite dry, bizarre/ironic sense of humor. For instance, one reccomendation is to "wear earplugs--that incessant moaning will drive you CRAZY."

always keep your receipt

I'm sure glad I did.

Turns out, when the deposit still had not posted by this morning into my bank account, I drove back to the same location, transaction receipt in hand, and inquired whether or not the money had gone into my bank account.

It had not.

This, my friends, is because (as I discovered in alarm this morning before I left) the last four digits of the account the money had been deposited into DID NOT MATCH MINE. Oh, yes, the checks had cleared--but to the wrong person.

While I had handed the teller a completed generic deposit slip, I didn't know my account number, so I handed her my driver's license as well. I assumed, wrongly, that she would take the time to make sure the money went to the correct account. As it turns out, she applied my deposit to another person with the same name. So, for the past day or so, this person has had MY paychecks in HER account. Grrrr.

But all is well. I was polite, the teller I worked with this afternoon was prompt, and my hard-earned cash was rushed back into its proper account without delay. Thank you very much.

From now on I am ONLY using the preprinted deposit slips in my checkbook, and I will never assume that a bank teller knows what he or she is doing. It is an unfortunate, but neccessary, precaution I must begin to take.

feelin' frustrated

No reason. Just life in general--it seems like I just always take the path less traveled, and therefore have a lot more hacking through the jungle to do.

For instance, my primary bank account is through a national bank that, for one reason or another, does not have a branch in my new town. Therefore, deposting a check is an ordeal, or a road-trip, depending on how you look at it. I made this road-trip to the nearest branch just in time to deposit my check on Friday. I went to the trouble to do so because I knew I'd need the money in my account to use for my bill payments online.

Of course, it never dawned on me that Monday was Columbus Day, and therefore my money would not post and STILL has not posted today. I am not a happy customer. I did NOT drive 45 minutes just for the fun of it. In other words: do not pass GO, do not collect $200.

i swear, i really don't have it out for bunnies!

But this has got to be the funniest book I have seen in a long time. I laughed at nearly every page while browsing at the bookstore. I very nearly bought the thing. In fact, I just might sometime soon. That is, as long as I don't impale myself with a javelin before I arrive or get sliced in two by the blade on a figure skater's skate. (See book for details).

creative rush

The ideas are coming again. After a period of relatively blechy creativity, my interest has been renewed and my ideas are coming fast and furious again.

It's kind of like a dry gulch that, once the rain hits, becomes a stream again.

Now the problem is staying afloat!

Current projects:

1) Have bought paints to do my Christmas cards this year. Have also sketched a couple of pages of thumbnails for the card, but have not made my final decision.

2) Keeping my spirits up about my business. Trying to pull together my many ideas and create one, unified entity.

3) Currently contemplating going forward with the t-shirt ideas I have.

4) Writing has once again started to work for me. Through an online forum for children's writers, I heard about an essay contest for twentysomethings that I intend to answer. The question is whether or not I have something unique to contribute--do I have a personal story that is worth picking out of thousands of others to include in an anthology of works from other authors my age?

5) While trying to keep myself on task in editing my fantasy/adventure novel for young adults, I have also a contemporary novella in the works about a homeless girl, and a new idea for a book about a girl during the Revolutionary War period in Colonial America. For both the homeless and Revolutionary books, I think I have landed on topics that have not been covered before, so I'm very excited about their prospects once completed!

6) Decorating my room with items bought 20% off at my Big Retail Store. It's very addicting. So much for a paycheck!

blue light special

So, it finally happened . . . after eight years of driving, I got pulled over by a police officer for speeding.

Yeah, speed trap--major time! I flew over the hill and saw the police cruiser just below me and, sure enough, got pulled over.

I didn't whine, cry, flirt or any other ploy. I had six minutes to clock in at work (which, incidentally, was literally around the corner. I even pointed to the building when the officer asked me where I was going in such a hurry), so I didn't play games. In fact, by the time the officer had approached my window, it was already rolled down and handed my paperwork and license to him without a word.

After a brief look-over of my license, registration, and proof of insurance, he handed them back with a stern "suggestion" that I do him a favor and driver slower. I agreed.

And that was that. I escaped a ticket!

Thank you, Mr. Policeman.

open and shut

I just heard back from the business owner. She sold the store last week to a good customer who was interested.

So, that means, for me, for now, stationery and/or boutique gifts and home decor is still the way to go. Unless another opportunity awaits around the corner!

I like not having to see-saw on decisions. Gimmee a simple "yes" or "no" any day and I sleep much better at night. So this is "no." And I'm cool with that!

buying an existing business????

Is it wise or foolish? Even more: is it impossible? Would I be stupid/insane/copping out to go this route?

In a completely different industry (in which I have worked part-time throughout college), someone I used to work for, is, I believe, selling one of her stores in a town I'd like to move back to. I've left her a voice mail and e-mail inquiring on the status of her biz for sale and telling her I'm interested in learning more about possibly buying it from her.

I have experience running the store (after all, as a former employee, I did!), I really, truly enjoyed the job, and the industry is a fun, creative one. In fact, the only things I don't know are a few technical issues (easily learned), bookkeeping, and stocking the store. Oh, and I don't really have any $$, but my parents are interested in possibly investing in it.

Of all the soul searching I've done in the past few months, and all the planning, I don't know if I can ever let go of my plans for MY business, but even more than my own ideas, I know that I will never be happy in either corporate America or working as a part-time cashier for the rest of my life.

So I'm going to wait and see if she responds to my inquiries. Maybe nothing will come of it. Maybe I'll decide it's not for me. Maybe she'll not want a former employee taking over business. Maybe I won't in a hundred years come up with the money needed to close the deal. I don't know. I just know that I'll never know for sure if it was something I should have done unless I at least investigate it further.

blech

I've been coming down with something for the past three days. It's probably my low immune system crashing from stress and too much sugar (the downside of working at a restaurant that serves great desserts!), seasonal mold allergies and the beginnings of sinusitus, the bane of my autumnal existence. Top it all off with a low-grade fever and you have an operational, but not so happy me.

Yucky.

shopaholic attack

An employee discount card in the hand of a design-crazy girl can be a very, very dangerous thing. I shopped at the Big Retail Store today for 3 hours and left bearing several bags full of home decor and clothing.

The beauty of my Big Retail Store is that it sells last season's fashions, overstocks, and other discounted merchandise. Add to that a 20% discount on just about anything I buy (including clearance items), and you have one big incentive to shop, shop, shop.

Nope. It's not T.J.Maxx, but a similar kind of store in which I've found numerous treasures for piddly-squat $$! I put back the $20 pair of Calvin Kleins that fit me perfectly so that I could afford to get the gorgeous photo albums, throw pillows, and floral-scented drawer liner sheets in a pretty pink-and-green print. It goes without saying that I adore beautiful things, especially those that I can afford that help "fake" a much more expensive look.

Now, there are certain things of which I simply refuse to get knock-offs. A Kate Spade bag, for example, or Lladro figurines, Birkenstocks, Diet Pepsi, Crown spiced cider mix, and antique silver trays. But show me a cute little picture frame or printed t-shirt from no-name company and I'm happy to buy it! And I have no qualms of using a perfectly nice print of Renoir or Monet, or buying a lamp or table or other household item that is a cheap but effective imitation of the actual $2,500 piece. This is because I like to mix and match real and fake, old and new, trendy and timeless.

My decorating style is most acurately described as flea-market eclectic, with a traditional bent and modern flair. I adore black and white photography, gilt-frame mirrors, quirky, off-beat pieces, the color red (of course!), greenery, shabby-chic furniture, strings of white lights, old packaging labels, real cut flower arrangements, and chandeliers with as much real crystal as is allowed by my budget.

I have so much more I want to buy still. I am going to wear my discount card out! For instance, there is a gorgeous dog bed my Zoe girl would love to sleep on, plenty of dresses and designer jeans that I need to try on, lots of Pilates DVDs that I should watch (and participate with, of course), hours and hours of classical, jazz, and easy-listening music on CDs at outrageous prices, and tons of tempting holiday decorations!

Yeah, I'm addicted. They'd better not fire me during the upcoming staff reduction.

yay for good tippers!

Being that I have moved so many times in my life, I have not had the opportunity to serve people at the tea room that I know. Until today. In walks my parent's realtor who helped us buy the house we live in now . . .

I greeted her cheerfully, as I greet all customers, but I soon realized I did know her, so we caught up and chatted pleasantly while I served her and her daughter their meals. I gave her excellent service, if I may say so myself, and, to my delight, she left me a nice, big tip. What a wonderful lady! Now, to go out and smooze with more people to help out my pocketbook . . .

Just kidding! I serve all of my customers with the same respect and courtesy. But a girl's got to support a shoe and purse habit somehow. *grin*

Now on to smiling as I ring up everyone's receipts at the Big Retail Store. So far, so good, but Grand Opening is coming this Saturday, and I'm a little nervous. It's going to be like a herd of cattle trampled through the rows of dresses and purses and household goods.

your comments are important!

But please, please, PLEASE be a real person.

I'm sorry for the inconvenience, but due to a recent outbreak of spam comments, I've had to turn on word verification. Whenever you post a comment, Blogger will ask you to type the series of letters that you see on the screen. This little bit of work will make the blog more accessible for all of my wonderful real live readers!

Thank you, and I appreciate every one of you and always gobble up the comments you leave. It's always a bit like Christmas morning when I find comments on one of my posts. I love hearing from people who have taken the time to read about my life.

what is AP style, again?

I had an unusual experience today. I turned down a potentially big opportunity to be a freelance graphic designer/production artist. Yes, you read that correctly . . . I turned it down.

More acurately, I started dropping hints that I might not be the best person for the job and the guy caught on and started to agree with me.

Why? Hmmmm. Because he wanted me to help him start a newspaper. In two weeks.

To borrow a Valley girl colloquialism, "as if!"

Seriously though, it would be a wonderful opportunity and a fantastic portfolio builder ("What's this?"; "Oh, just a newspaper I designed and produced . . .") but while I got the impression that while he was a serious entrepreneur and seemingly nice guy, I got the wrong kind of vibe from him when it came to business ethics and organization (while I hand it to the guy that he is trying to start something, I feel he should at the bare minimum know the terms of the industry. He asked me to explain what I meant by "will you be following AP style" . . .and the style guide of the Associated Press is only used by EVERY newspaper in America).

Can I see myself juggling two part-time jobs AND a newspaper, even a weekly one? Nope. Especially not when cutting corners and disorganization are involved. Or when the payment considered "fair" is only $8/hr. for being the designer/production artist/art director/production manager all rolled into one.

Very unfortunately, the guy is trying to pay his "consultants" based on a what a small regional daily newspaper pays their staff of "designers." When I told him that freelancers would probably charge him at least $15/hr. (but should be much more!!) his eyebrows went WAYYY up. And when I pointed to a basic real estate ad and told him it would take at least 20 minutes to set it up from scratch, and then told him to multiply that amount of time by the number of ads he intended to have in his paper PLUS the actual content, the eyebrows went up again. ("Oh. Really? But the newspaper does a daily every day."). Yeah. And they have more than one person designing things, not to mention a production manager to oversee the printing and quality control.

The whole experience got me thinking, though. I should really be prepared for this kind of thing more often. If I knew what the precise fair going rate for freelance work was, and had a basic work order sheet prepped, I could maybe really do it (once I have the software, that is). As it was, mild mannered me actually told this guy that I would love to help him out as a consultant getting started, and to give me a call--but I'd charge him next time for my advice. And he said, "I understand. Thanks!"

Hmmm. The entrepreneur in me is starting to feel the wheels turning in her head!

in light of recent posts . . .

Today is Sunday, a day I am normally pulling myself out of bed around 7 a.m. to get ready to go to the early worship service at my parent's current choice of church. This is not to say that doing so is a bad thing; in fact, I like their church. But it is small and I have yet to talk with anyone my own age. I'm not age-ist, mind you, I like to mix things up and chat with 75 year-olds and 7.5 year-olds alike, but it would still be nice to relax over a hamburger and Diet Coke and smooze with another "young professional." That being said, I have decided to continue my own hunt for a church by visiting Singles Bible Study classes in other places.

But today I am staying home, reading my Bible for the first time in a long time just for the sake of reading my Bible. No standing up and sitting down on cue, no singing of pre-selected songs, no smiling and nodding and shaking of hands as the choir comes down mid-service. Today I am just me, sitting quietly on the porch with my God. To some, Christianity is a process of religiousity and ceremonies based on tradition. For me, that is not enough. I need hear that Still Small Voice, to know that I am at peace, and that when the rest of my life is crazy and unpredictable and so wearisome, God is still at the center of my existence, keeping me from spinning out of control.

tired sleepy and tired achey

The first of many long weeks to come has hit me pretty hard. My two part-time jobs are getting ever-so-slightly easier, but, then again, practice makes perfect.

I'm barely on the Internet at all anymore, which is unusual for me. My blogging has slowed down to a crawl, and my fiction writing has all but stopped, with only the occasional thought towards my current protagonists and what they might be up to. Activity on forums has petered out as well. With my dear Paperpreneurs down, I've been reduced to only Verla Kay's children's writers forum, and my participation there has been sadly lacking lately.

I've read of internet paper friends who are in the midst of paper-biz-identity ponderings, and I myself am in one as I write this. As Shakespeare wrote, "to be, or not to be? That is the question." Ruby Red, at the pace I am going, is a long time coming. And, already, only a year from when the idea first began germinating, I am doubting the veracity of my desire to run a wholesale manufacturing business to the extent that I would need to in order to truly provide a salary.

Meanwhile, I'm forging ahead in my part-time jobs. Serving at the tea room is going well, although the days I work in the kitchen wear me out more, since I don't get to move around as much and I am still learning how to prepare the dishes. All in all, though, I love the tea room and everyone who works there. My boss is amazing, and the other staff are wonderful to work with--a true dream team, where everyone automatically helps the others out. The only downsides to the job are that I am so tired on kitchen days when I head over to my second job, and it is usually slow-ish several days per week, which makes the tip $$ less.

As for the great big retail store, it is set up and in the process of "soft opening," which means no advertisements or radio spots yet. October 1st is our Grand Opening, and I am scheduled to work cashier in the evening. I'm scared! Of my two jobs, this is the one I wish I didn't need to have. While I actually really enjoy cashiering and interacting with the customers, the bureacracy and rules are driving me crazy!!! I am by nature a conscientious, hard worker, but everything I have to remember, and all the procedures I have to follow are making me weary. I've already earned a spot in the "BOOK OF SHAME" for not writing the expiration dates for driver's licenses on checks the first day I worked. At least, that's what my trainer told me, as she smiled and said it was "good for you. You won't make the same mistake again." GrrrrRRRRrrrr! Let me just say, humilating me over something like that is not the way to make me a happy, loyal employee. The learning curve at this job is expected to be about zero. Either you "got it," or you didn't when you went through your two hours of training, listening to a fast-talking trainer who only went over things once and was frequently interrupted by calls to help elsewhere. I still do not understand the logic behind refusing to leave the training book next to the registers so that we cashiers can reference it and find the simple answers to our questions without paging a manager every ten minutes or so.

Meanwhile, this conscientious, hard worker has already missed a day she was scheduled . . . on accident. The schedule changed during our first set-up days, and I swear I double-checked my schedule at least two or three times, but I still ended up coming in to work last night and being told I wasn't on the schedule . . . but I had been the night before. I hope I don't get fired.

I just hope it all gets better, because the 10-15 hour days are soon going to wear me out for good. The bright spot in this cloud is that my store manager is very easy to get along with and seems to understand that we're still learning. Also, I have already told myself that I'm free to leave the retail job at any time, if need be. I'm treating it as a way to save up some emergency funds, pay off as much of my credit card debt as possible, and perhaps set aside a little for starting my business.

All this to say: I'm busy, and I'm tired, and I'm brain-dead. My creativiy is being sapped from my body by mind-numbing fatigue. But I'm getting stronger, and more determined than ever to make it on my own sooner than later. I don't think I want to do this for more than 6 months. I'll go crazy.

Nine West, Tommy Hilfiger, Ann Taylor, & Limited Too

What do these brands have in common?

I handled them today while stocking the new store. It was a long day on the feet, let me tell you, and tomorrow it will only get longer. I got off at 9:00 p.m today and I go in at 7 a.m. tomorrow so that I can drive out Nashville way to go to my friends' wedding.

As for Zoe, it looks like Frontline is my next attempt. I thought for sure that the vet treated her with it when she was groomed, but I'll check and see if I was mistaken. Thanks for all the recommendations!

yes, i'm still alive

I'm a busy girl, again. For nearly two weeks now I've been waitressing at a tea room, as well as working some of the time preparing salads and sandwiches and such in the kitchen. Friday, I'll be starting a second part-time job at a large retail outlet store in the evenings. Sunday, I'll be going to the wedding of two good friends of mine.

Otherwise, my time has been spent shopping for some much needed clothing and makeup, and fighting the battle with fleas.

My poor Zoe girl is an outdoor dog with an itchy problem. I have done everything (and I do mean EVERYTHING) outside of a flea collar (which I am buying ASAP) to keep my poor baby flea-free. I've dusted, squirted, combed, bathed, and had professionally groomed. I've even dusted the yard where she sits with Borax, which I have read in several places is a SURE THING to rid areas of fleas. Every time I think I have those little buggers whupped they come back with their friends and family. Unfortunately, she can't become a house dog (hair issues for household members). So I am stuck combing her and drowning the nasty critters in soapy water so they can't escape. My poor, poor doggie!

reflections on a consumer life

I have officially decided that I have probably broken the "thou shalt not covet" rule in regards to Banana Republic's Fall 2005 line. 'Cause I want it. ALL.

That being said, what I want in particular is this gorgeous satiny skirt in a deep plum color that would, I know, look great on me . . . and would be just perfect to wear to my friends' wedding in a couple of weeks. And the cashmere short-sleeve sweater hanging just above it wouldn't hurt, either.

This, from a rare window-shopping trip to the "big city" (hah!) in which I began to drool over some things and turn my nose up at others. Here are my observations, in no particular order.

1. Profitt's has turned a corner of it's little girls section into a magenta and silver "boutique" featuring make-your-own pucker candy (sour sugar powder strangely reminiscent of those beachy sand art kiosks) and big, bold signs screaming "bling it on." For 10 year olds. Please.

2. It is fun to walk into Hot Topics in completely normal clothing and get a confused, "can I help you?" from the girl behind the counter who has hot pink hair and a ring in between her nostrils. It is even more fun to buy something. My something was a bumper sticker that reads "I *heart* carbs." Yummy! Bonus points: read all of the t-shirts on the wall and giggle to yourself. Almost buy the one that references Pac Man.

3. Mall bookstores are sad. Where's the Starbucks??

4. Are you old when you begin to walk past American Eagle or Aeropostale and you aren't even tempted ONCE to walk in.

5. Speaking of which, wearing clothes that essentially make you a walking billboard is just weird, if you think about it.

6. And, while we're on the subject, why doesn't Abercrombie & Fitch just hang up a mirrored disco ball, shoot out some fog, flash some lights, and hand out glow sticks at the door. It already sounds like a rave. (I can picture the waif-thin employees bobbing trance-like to the music while folding jeans).

7. Indie boutiques are the BEST.

8. The ultimate spend-free window shop is a trip to the antique store with a friend. "Wow, look at this! It's a wall-sconce-candle-thingy from Tibet." or "check out these salt and pepper shakers," or "wait a minute! I had that Ninja Turtles lunchbox in elementary school. I'm not antique!" Occasionally, break down and buy the 1st edition 1910 book called "Audrey's Obessesion" or something. Or the 1940's couch with authentic cigarette burns. It'll be fun.

9. Cold Stone Creamery's Mint Mint Chocolate Chocolate ice cream is yummy!

10. Sequin belts. I need one really, really bad.

11. Green corduroy hats look good on me.

ooookaaaayyy

So after posting my diatribe on the futility of being me, I went to bed, fell deep asleep, and dreamed.

Specifically, I dreamed that I had visited my old job at the publishing company. And then I dreamed that I kept a bunch of rather large tropical fish and hermit crabs IN MY CLOSET. ????? Helloooooo? It wasn't even like I had a fish tank in there. The water just stayed in my closet, even when I opened the door. Stranger yet were the fish that simply swam on out into my room in the air. I was particularly disturbed by the giant hermit crabs. I did NOT want them rambling across my walls and onto my face while asleep.

Weird. I don't think I'm even gonna TRY to figure that one out.

1 a.m. sleep-deprived delusions

I snuck up to the den to go online in the middle of the night because my mind is going a mile a minute (or more!), and I can't sleep because the thoughts won't stop running around inside my head. They are self-doubting thoughts, ugly "I won't get anywhere ever" thoughts, scary "I'm running out of money" thoughts, bloated "I'm fat, fat, fat thoughts." So I am typing them out. Spilling my guts. Naming my demons. Be gone!

Fact is, I'm terrified, but I'm trying hard to ignore that as I get used to being a couch potato. One month into my third bout of unemployment in less than two years, and I'm beginning to feel worthless. Again. The worst part is, in the midst of sending out perfected resumes and flawless cover letters, I've become more and more desparate to do my own thing. I have good ideas--great ideas! I have the drive, the desire, the focus. I just don't have the money with which to begin. It makes getting passionate about working for someone else . . . well, much less attractive.

If it wasn't everything at once, I might be able to relax, to reassure myself it will all work out. But then my mind chides, "you need to lose weight and get in shape", "you must pay off your credit card", "you should get a boyfriend and go out more", "you have got to send out those manuscripts you've written!" And, of course, lest for a moment I forget, "GET A JOB!!!!!"

1:16 a.m. now. Tomorrow is another day, or at least Annie says so. Actually, today is already another day. Now, if I can just convince my brain to let me go to sleep . . .

economy, my foot

As if I wasn't discouraged enough about my job hunt, I have to go to CareerJournal.com after reading a book that mentioned it, and there I find a discussion board about CEOs and other yuppy types that are in a similar bind. Yuck. Double yuck.

a pleasant shock!

Here I was, surfing the web for jobs, when I decided to check in on the ol' alma mater. I went to the College of Mass Communication website and almost shouted in surprise. My heart was fluttering with pride, for I found this!

I won a competition to design a logo for the College my last semester of my senior year in '04, but I never heard anything about it after graduating. And then there! Bam! I floats onto the main page out of nowhere.

Now, to some it's no big deal to see a logo they designed in use, but this was a first for me. At a prize of $300, it was the best money I've made to date on a design I've done.

p.s. the design is based on the Mass Comm building's "face" and the concept of information being "broadcast" outward on waves.

observation

It is nearly impossible to find a decent address book when shopping in a small town!

I tried, and failed, today to find a nice, practical, semi-attractive, LARGE (who can write in those tiny pocket-sized ones!), and, most importantly, MODERATELY PRICED address book.

I need an address book, because, as much as I love paper, keeping my friends, family, and business contact's envelopes (so I can find their addresses) in a box is getting just plain ridiculous. For the last two years, only a fraction of my Christmas cards have actually made it into the mail, merely because I couldn't find an address! How bad is that!

My search, alas, was unsuccessful.

my dream house

A really good friend of mine recently asked visitors to her blog to describe their dream homes. This was my long-winded reply that I liked so much (I want to buy this place!) that I decided to share it here, too.

My dream home is no more than 2,000 sf. It is either an Arts and Crafts bungalow, or a really nice cape cod cottage, circa 1920, with wooden or new white vinyl windows and window-sill flower boxes, a white front porch, cozy siding, and a yard that is impeccably landscaped in English Country style. Inside, it has quaint architectural touches that make it historically authentic and visually pleasing.

The dining room is painted a deep, bright red (my favorite), with a white chair rail. The kitchen is an Italian-villa aged yellow with sponged or rag texture in varying shades of that color. The cabinets are new, with a medium brown stain and glass windows in the doors. The refrigerator has an ice machine in the door (I've always wanted one of those!), and on the walls are metal or wooden signs saying things like, "Hamburgers, 5 cents each," or "Latte."

The living room is white-on-white, with leafy-green accents and a few red items here and there (because every room needs a little red!). The fixtures are golden, and there is an adorable chandelier with real crystals hanging from the ceiling. Ferns keep you company. The couch, while beautiful, is completely sittable. And you can prop your feet on the coffee table while watching TV (which, incidentally is a widescreen LCD on the wall with Bose surround sound). A couple of my most recent novels are on the end table. Just in case you want to read them.

My bedroom, and the guest bedroom, would be retreats from the world, full of homey comforts and good books to read. If they get a little messy, so what? That's why they have DOORS. Oh, and my bedroom has an attached full bathroom with separate shower and Jacuzzi garden tub.

The third bedroom is my office. Floor to ceiling bookshelves and state-of-the-art technology are in this room. You can see the wide flat-panel cinema screen of my Mac from the door. The floor is tile, because it MUST be easy to clean, after I get paint all over it from my latest art, or perhaps paper clippings and glue from my stationery business. Oh, and I have one of those nifty hands-free, cord-free headsets to wear, because they're just COOL.

Oh, and outside, in the backyard where is is just slightly less beautiful landscaping (the better to fit a sun room, big deck, and small in-ground swimming pool, my dear), is a fenced area for Zoe, my dog, to play in and chase squirrels. And, just after the driveway, there is a separate workshop where I do the letterpress printing of my custom invitations and high-end notecards. Can't have a 2,000 lb. monster in my office, now, can I? Besides, I have to fit the dozens of wooden drawers that hold my metal type, wooden "furniture" to hold the type in place, and pieces of "leading" to fit between the lines of type. Not to mention my expansive collection of 1800s and early 1900s "dingbats" and "printer's ornaments."

I guess that about sums it up nicely! Not too much to ask is it?

oh, dear

This message brought to you by the Friends for the Responible Use of Fonts.

things to do

1) Get Zoe's nails clipped at the vet's, for goodness sake!
2) Oil change. Again.
3) Volunteer at local library to stay busy and rack up brownie points.
4) Send out sci-fi short story. Stop questioning its saleability. (Is that a word?)
5) Sneak the money from savings account and register business in county.
6) Do not tell unemployed self that I have sneaked money from my savings.
7) Work on promised logo for friend.
8) Work on Christmas postcard/card idea for kick-off design this winter.

deep in the hunt

The papers have begun stacking up. Newspapers, printouts, real estate/apartment guides. They sit around my room as testimonies to my search for an income.

I am happy to announce that I sent out three resumes and handed in one application this week, with the prospect for more to come early next week.

I have, in particular, one job that I am practically salivating over. I want it. Bad. It's not a design job, but it's something I have 4+ years of experience in. Unfortunately, my experience is nearly five years old now. I'm trying to create a hybrid functional/chronilogical resume that will highlight my experience an downplay the time since my last employment in the field, but that will also honestly portray my work history and abilities. Any suggestions??? I don't want the resume reviewer to think, "oh,this girl is hiding something undesirable. She doesn't have enough experience." Which isn't true. Not at all.

In fact, while the list of functions for the job does include a few things I have not done before, I recently took a printout of the job posting to my former employer in that field and she looked it over and said I qualified for the position! She told me to list her as a reference and said she would do everything she could to help.

Basically, the job post said that the position required a minimum of a college degree in either that particular field "or similar degree." Check. "Some" experience of work experience in the field. Check (4 years). And proficient in Microsoft Office. Check! (OK, so I need to improve my Excel . . . but I can still use the program effectively. And I know how to click on "Help.")

The clincher for me is the salary and benefits offered. For someone like me they are GOOD. Good enough for me to not only move to a nearby city, but also rent a decent apartment or rent a cheaper one and save for a down payment on my cottage of dreams! It would also help support Ruby Red, by helping finance my start-up.

And I could go clothes shopping again. Without guilt!

Did I mention I want this job?!!!!

I'm almost afraid to admit how much I would love to work at this particular place. I'm afraid I'll get my hopes up so high that I'll come crashing down again when I don't hear back from the organization. I actually applied for a lesser position at the same place during my last job-hunt and was sent a generic letter 3 MONTHS LATER saying they had selected a more qualified and suitable applicant.

This time around, however, I heard about the job from the Career Center for my local area. Supposedly they have "referred" me, and out of my entire state, only 10 people can be "referred" for this position. Whatever that means.

Granted, the position is also listed on the bulletin board of said organization, as well as online. So, many other people can apply outside of the Career Center.

Am I rambling? Am I hoping against hope?

We'll see.

(But I want that job!)

can you hear the Twilight Zone theme song???

I've been having crazy thoughts lately, people. CrAZy.

Crazy, like, "well, since I don't have a job, why not . . . go to school again?"

The thoughts are in the works. It's all rather hush-hush at the moment, so I can't divulge any particulars, but let me say these thoughts have definite life-changing potential if I decide to follow through on them.

making me glad I haven't bought Quark 6.5 yet!

Did you hear? Did you know?

Extra! Extra! Read all about it!

For those who might be a tad slow to pick up the faster-than-a-speeding bullet rate of the technology business (i.e. ME) I am pleased to belatedly announce the astonishing, amazing, completely and totatally, like, awesome news that Quark is expected to release QuarkXPress 7.0 by early next year and maybe even sooner! This, according to last month's creativepro.com story, which you can read here.

Especially juicy features of the brand-new QuarkXPress is OpenType capabilities, transparency settings that give Photoshop a run for its money, and better screen drawing . . . sharper images on screen.

see?

I am upbeat once more.

Did a "stationery company" search in Google News to perk me up and found an interesting little story about Crane & Co. papers on the Boston.com website.

Unfortunately, the direct link was too long, but you can access it by going to the Technology section and signing up for a free registration to read the articles. The one I'm referring to was published August 1, 2005 and is titled "Nothing Counterfeit About Success." Here's a little snippet:

"In the mid-19th century, Berkshire County paper maker Crane & Co. devised a way to stop counterfeiters from bleaching bank notes and reprinting them as higher denominations. Crane weaved silk threads into its paper, distinguishing $1 notes with a single thread, $2 notes with two threads and so on."

The article then goes on to discuss how Crane & Co. has once again helped the good 'ol US of A keep our bills from being forged in the present day.

Just goes to show that paper people are the innovators of society! (well, maybe a bit dramatic . . . but you know what I mean.)

ok, i'm done whining now

really.

tennessee is not graphic-design friendly this month

There is hardly any graphics jobs open at the moment, and even fewer that I qualify for (most are art director type positions).

On one hand, I am hearing my little benefits-hungry voice saying "Go get a job! Any job! Now!", and on the other I hear the creative monster inside saying "NoooOooooOoooOOOo!", "I don't wanna!", "Do your own thing."

Shut up, you two.

taking a break from worry

If there ever was a time to take my mind off the stresses of the present and focus on a pleasant topic, well, it's now.

I promised I'd talk about my other love: words and writing them. I am currently in the process of doing the final edits on a 400+ page (double-spaced, that is!) YA fantasy/adventure novel. This venture has consumed more of my time in the past five years than even Ruby Red. Maybe I'm slow, but my average editing speed is 3-4 pages every 15 minutes. At currently around page 165, I have a ways to go. You do the math!

I loosely based the setting for the book on the way of life in early Renaissance Italy. In a nutshell, it's a classic trio of characters: a prince, a beggar, and a gypsy-like maiden, who join together under unusual and frightening circumstances to save the City from a ring of fire surrounding its walls, and the prince's parents from a mysterious mercenary who has turned their people against them.

I like happy endings, so my book has one. The prince learns to be a humble leader, the beggar becomes who he was meant to be, and the maiden discovers a secret that will change her life forever.

Of course every author is the biggest fan of his or her work, so though I like my story, the best praise I've ever gotten from those who have read portions of the manuscript was the praise my (then) 16-year-old baby brother gave me when he said he had stayed up until 2:00 a.m. reading the rest of my book with a flashlight so that our parents wouldn't catch him up that late!!!

well, this is one way to make a decision . . .

okaaaaaay.

Yeah, I'm not getting an apartment right now. Or a house. OR a condo. Not even a roommate.

This, my friends, is because as of next Friday, July 29, I will no longer be getting a regular paycheck.

For I have lost my job. Literally. It no longer exits. Kapoof! Gone. The New Job is now officially The Old Job. The other Old Job has now achieved Really Old Job statis.

Those of you who are fellow Paperpreneurs may have read about it over there. For those who haven't, the summary is as follows:

8:25 a.m. Arrive at work.
11:30 a.m. Finish an ad
11:45 a.m. Called in to the VP's office, along with rest of staff
11:47 a.m. Staff meeting called by VP's father (the owner/founder) begins with the words "We called you all in here to let you know that we are closing this office."
11:47:30 VP's mother, eyes red, dabs with an already sopping tissue at the tears running silently down her cheeks.
11:47:45 It actually registers that I have been laid off. My first thought is of my looming bills. My second is, "well, I guess I don't have to worry about where I should get a house out here.

I'm going to rent

I think. Maybe. Probably?

I've given it much thought over the past couple of days, and probably over 100 miles of driving around looking at areas around the city to get a "feel" for it.

I found a decent apartment complex about 15 minutes from my favorite parking garage. It's a studio apartment. Tiny doesn't even begin to describe it! But that's OK because they allow dogs (I won't part from my Zoe girl), and the rent is less than what I'm currently paying for gas and my lease-break payments from my former apartment in Nashville. This means I can afford it. That is a very good thing. :)

Oh, and I can PAINT the walls!!!!!!!!!

Yes, that makes me happy! I HATE generic white apartment walls.

p.s. I actually called the number on a FSBO (For sale by owner). It was a cute little cottage that had been fixed up. The guy asked me if I had looked into financing yet. I mentally panicked! While I quickly explained I was only just beginning to look around, and he was very gracious in response, I realized that at this point in my life I'm not so sure I'm ready to make that kind of long-term commitment. I felt like a bride having pre-wedding jitters!

I think I'm going crazy

There are so many options right now, and I don't have the time or willpower to process them all. But, the facts remain: I'm broke, in debt (though much less than others I know), and worn out from my commute.

My options:

1) Continue living at my parents house and just deal with my commute (oh, did I mention I hydroplaned on the interstate last week during a particularly rainy morning?? And almost hit the car next to me?? As well as a near miss with the cement road divider??)

2) Rent and have absolutely no available $$$ for anything beside a roof over my head and gas. The real estate equivalent of driving down I-40 and tossing hundred dollar bills out of the driver's seat window.

3) Somehow beg my way into purchasing a condominium or teeny-tiny old house downtown so I can walk or take the trolley to work, hence saving money. (But how to get that pesky down payment and closing costs? And how to pass the credit check when my savings account is on a starvation diet? And how to convince the loan officer I AM over 18, and thereby able to sign a legal document??)

4) Forget the whole life-supporting job thing and jump into the business head first. Convince a SBA person to loan me enough to rent a commercial space with an apartment overhead so I can "open up shop" and collect printing supplies to work with while living in the same place. Zero commute. But living in danger of repossesion!

5) Shelve my beloved Ruby Red for a few more years, keep doing research and preparations while focusing on becoming a better and more recognized professional in the design field, and continue to write, in hopes of earning enough from an advance and royalties to get my business started. (Did I mention I have a dozen or so children's and young adult projects in the works? Betcha didn't know that! In fact, for a change of pace, I think I'll write my next post about THAT part of my life).

6) Bury my head in the sand. Or move to Venezuala and hide in the rainforest. Or take a vow of poverty. Or run into a handsome billionaire on the corner, "twist" my ankle and be carried to the nearest hospital, where, of course, we will fall in love, marry in the chapel, and immediately relocate to Bermuda, where he will buy me an entire letterpress print-shop with cases and cases of type and dingbats, gallons of brilliant inks, and truck loads of fine papers! When I am not smudging ink on my nose, he will find me snorkling among a school of bright blue fish.

Personally? I like the billionaire angle. Positively polictically incorrect, but a girl can dream!

I'm begging for advice here, fair readers. If you were me, which would you choose????

did I mention?

There is an absolutely fabulous used bookstore in the city of my New Job. It is already probably in the top 5 of my favorite places to be there. May I just say that this store is, as a one of my co-workers would say, "ginormous." You can wander aisles and aisles of 8 ft. high bookshelves filled with all sorts of books, or CDs, or DVDs, or even computer games. You can trade in your used items for cash or credit.

Today was my first time to trade in. I got 3 books for free with my credit! One book was for Neenah papers, showing how ink prints in different ways on different types of their paper. I can't wait to page through it.

Last week, though, I came across the Paperie book by Kate's Paperie. I immediately snatched it off the shelf and hugged it close, almost afraid some other paper-lovin' gal would fight me for it! I haven't had the opportunity to absorb it all, but I'm looking forward to some Saturday afternoon sitting down and taking it all in over a mug of coffee. Yum!

boxland must go!

So, I spent the 4th unpacking the last pesky boxes stacked around the perimeter of my bedroom. Or, rather, the pesky boxes and piles of random stuff littering my floor AND covering the perimeter walls.

I am happy to report I can now safely walk through my room. I can see the whole rug (minus under furniture), and I can find my business and design books quickly on their new designated shelves. Three cheers for organization! Now . . . on to the deadly stacks of paper that must be filed in my new (hand-me-down) filing cabinet!

Let Freedom Ring

Freedom is such a precious thing that I, for one, take for granted every day.

And, as an entrepreneur, the ease of starting your own business, even with all of the red tape and taxes and regulations, is, when you think about it, completely amazing. Were it not for a few good people who went against the flow 300+ years ago (more, if you go back to Columbus!), we might not have the opportunity to be doing what we do today.

It's not all been good, and there are those even in our own lifetimes who have horribly misused this freedom.

But, despite it all, I'm still grateful to have the privilege to go about my own business (literally!), hold my own opinions, speak out with my own voice, and worship (or not) as my conscience sees fit.

So this is my "Thank You," to those who made it possible.

Yeeeeeee Hawwwww!

That got yer attention now, didn't it??? Yep. I thought so. :)

After work today, I walked down to the world-famous (OK, maybe not the WHOLE world, but at least anyone who reads HOW magazine) Yee-Haw Industries in downtown Knoxville. They are a letterpress company that has their shop in a storefront. The great folks of Yee-Haw even let visitors walk past the check-out counter into the actual workspace to watch them at work.

I walked down an entire wall of old wooden trays full of metal type and miscellany. It was fantastic!!! This was my first time ever in an actual shop atmosphere. I even got a mini-lecture on the workings of an "old Vandercook model" letterpress while the girl, roughly my age, was printing sheets of a light brown color paper with bright red ink.

I was in a letterpress-lovin' heaven! It only increased my desire to do the same thing one day (in my own style, of course!).

While at Yee-Haw, I even bought a couple of letterpress printed postcards. The first one reads "My Grass Is Blue", and the second one says "Knoxville Girl". You see similar products (although, unfortunately, not the exact cards I'm talking about) by checking out Yee-Haw for yourself at their website: Yee-Haw Industries.

now more than ever

I am determined to get Ruby Red up and running. Though The New Job has been both a blessing and a refreshing change of pace (stress-wise), I am still lacking in *cough* $$$.

I'm looking to maybe buy a small house (read: VERY SMALL) in the rural county outside of the city where I work. This is simply not going to happen unless I have extra income.

Besides . . . after tons of real estate ads, my creative juices are dying to get creative again!

go read this book!

Invitations
by Marc Friedland

I haven't finished it yet, but it's full of wonderful examples and inspirations!

USA TODAY recognizes the small-biz greeting card entrepreneurs

This weekend, USA TODAY's Lorrie Grant brought the story of the upstart greeting card company to the masses. She reported that while card sales have been in somewhat of a slump overall, small and specialty boutique cardmakers have seen continued success by following their individual interests and marketing to others who share that interest.

This is good news for those of us who either are, or intend to, do just that!

Here are a list of websites mentioned in the story:
Lyrics2go
The Message
AnneLisa
Inspirational Arts
Stacy M. Design

Also mentioned, but no address given:
Laugh Lines

so i now i want a scanner, please

If there is one thing The New Job is doing for me, it is teaching me fairly rapidly the mundane BUT extremely necessary Photoshop things that somehow I never learned in school, like MASKS and CLIPPING PATHS and how to adjust GRADIENTS.

I know. I know. Shouldn't I have already known this??? Nope! And it hasn't been until recently that I've begun to actually understand the whole way the program works. Once I found out it is based on film developing, the lightbulb clicked on. Ohhhhh! So THAT's what BURN TOOL means. And now I understand why you have to DODGE to lighten things up. (Dodge?? Isn't that what you do when all the faster, more athletic kids in gym class throw those nasty red gym balls at you and when you don't move fast enough the balls bounce off of you with a sickening *pong* sound that reverberated in your ears and turns your cheeks red with shame when you know that you had just been affirmed, once again, as "the easy target.")

In my alma mater's defense, I will point out that I wasn't in the artsy graphic design classes. I learned practical things like how to lay out large portions of text without losing content, and how to recognize Franklin Gothic from a mile away, or what is most important when choosing an opening photograph for a photo-journalism piece. There was no lessons in making TIFFs have "transparent" backgrounds, because, quite frankly, we were supposed to find that out for ourselves. We had a professor who not only encouraged us to be self-starters (after all, that's what the real world requires), but also INSISTED on our ability to learn what we needed through trial and error, one of the surest ways to have how NOT to do things burned into your neural pathways.

Anyway, now I'm learning voraciously on my own, just like I had always been encouraged to do (Thank you, Professor Wong!!!), and it's really paying off. Just the other day, while using the LEVELS ADJUSTMENT LAYER to clean up the colors in a photograph, I proceeded to follow the directions I read in a how-to column. And today I made my very first clipping path, all on my own, by following directions from the COLOR SELECTION advice I read in a book to create a WORK PATH that I could convert to a CLIPPING PATH to make the TIFF "transparent," and, therefore, the logo I was working on could be placed on any colored background, not just white, as it was originally designed to be.

I am on my way to Photoshop guru-ness!!!

So now I want a scanner. Because now I can scan in my sketches and trace them with the PEN TOOL in either Illustrator or Photoshop to make line art out of my designs and get started producing product, already!!!

happy birthday to me!

So, 25 years ago, back when the 80s had just begun and Star Wars was the biggest thing since sliced bread, I entered the world, kicking and screaming, and generally trying to get my own way.

I guess some would say not much has changed since then! :)

I can't believe I've already hit the quarter-century mark. To some, I am still a young'en, as they say here in Tennessee. To others, I'm ancient already. I mean, wow! She's twenty-five. She (insert gasp here), used to TIGHT ROLL HER JEANS at one time. She wore those funky sunglasses with the black lenses and frames and neon pink sides. She curled her bangs into a giant pouf on her forehead. Yikes. Like, totally gross! (Uh-huh. Just you wait. What goes around, comes around--heaven forbid!!!)

I'm just hoping that my auto insurance rates go down for when I renew in August.

Anyways, free virtual chocolate cake for all. Eat up!

Two more signs . . .

Seen on a Long John Silvers sign:

Now Hiring
Crabs & Shrimp

Seen on another food store sign (I think it was a grocery store):

Boston Butt
$1.19/lb

Tired

I'm tired. The 1-hr commute is just KILLING me! I get home and have no desire to much of anything but collapse on the couch or go to bed early.

This is not to say that I'm not enjoying The New Job. I actually have begun to feel like an operating part of the team. It's nice not to have to ask my manager "what can I do??" every 30 minutes or so.

I've already learned much about Photoshop that didn't know before, and a few more shortcuts in Quark. Yay, for shortcut keys!!

As for Ruby Red, I feel like it is still there, but almost more of a dream than it was before. I plan on registering my business name and domain name soon, but beyond that I don't think it will be easy to start-up this year. This is discouraging, but not stopping me from trying to continue.

In the meantime, one thing my hour-long commute has done for me is to give me time to relax while listening to the radio, or listen to suspense novels on tape, or continue to play my favorite unconscious "spot the funny sign game". I have already seen two more signs to add to my collection. In fact, it has become such a habit for me, and sort of a stress-reliever, that I'm seriously considering starting a new blog devoted just to my signs.

I'll keep you updated.

I know, I know!! I've been lazy lately!

So sorry!

I solemnly promise to post some more juicy content soon, very soon.

Cross my heart . . .

seen on a grocery store sign in town

legs and thigs, $3 lb.

I wonder what thigs taste like??!!

On the other hand, since it didn't really specify which breed of animal it was referring to (although I knew good and well), it's a relief to know that my own legs and thigs are worth, upon estimation, approximately $120 each.

I'm back! (with DSL!)

I'm still in moving-box limbo at the moment, but I have a bed, and a table for my computer, and access to my parent's computer which has--gasp!--DSL. This is a first for us, having previously been stuck in the dial-up stone-ages.

Been at work for 2 weeks now. Moving along nicely. I'm actually working on some realtor ads now!

Business planning is still stalled, but it will come back full force shortly. In the meantime, I'm rooting for all of my online friends at Paperpreneurs.com who are right now, as I write this, setting up for the National Stationery Show in NYC. Good Luck!

on "vacation"

I am not going to be able to post for the next week or so … not sure when I'll have access to the Internet after the move.

As Tigger would say, TTFN!

(ta-ta-for-now)

my new life

After having completed my second day at work, I feel like I’m a wee bit closer to understanding how it all works. I have already begun to remember what it is like to be very, very busy again! This 1 1/2 hour commute is really taking a sizeable chunk out of my day. Pretty much the past two days (and, I’m sure, the rest of the week) have been as follows:

1. Get up before the sun
2. Bleary-eyed, get ready to go
3. Leave no later than 6:45 a.m. (I know, I know—most school kids have to be ready before then! Call me spoiled).
4. Drive to work; arrive around 8:15, just in time to find parking and take the elevator to work.
5. At 8:30, walk through the door of my new place of employment
6. Sit and watch as other do their day-to-day tasks, as I take notes, ask questions, and try not to get bored during repetitive tasks.
7. Have lunch. Today was a co-worker’s birthday, which we celebrated with pizza and a cookie cake. Yay, for free lunch!
8. After lunch, go back to observing the work-flow procedures. Actually, despite the occasional bored moments, I’m quite pleased that this is part of my training. At my last job, there was no training, other than how to send a package, and where to find art and archived Cds. So, not being responsible for a thing other than learning how things work makes me HAPPY! J
9. Clock out; drive home.
10. Eat a late dinner. Pet the dog. Go to bed.
11. Rinse. Repeat. (just kidding!)

In other news, Wednesday is Packing Day. There is, as they say here in the hills of Tennessee, a “big ol’” Ryder moving truck parked in our driveway. By Thursday evening everything we own, outside of our air-mattresses, toiletries, and the clothes we plan on wearing during Friday’s move, will be inside its cavernous walls.

suddenly, my life is feeling different

It hit me Friday that, in exactly one week, I will be writing this blog in another house. Except for some random papers and clothing that needs to be put in the wash, I'm packed. Really. My room is soooo empty right now! Just furniture and a few paper business things I couldn't live without.

So, for the second time within the span of three months, I am moving AGAIN. I will probably be staying with my parents in their new home for at least the next 6 months or so, but we'll see. I'm done trying to predict the future.

Speaking of future, I just read the weirdest "true story" I've come across in a very long time. I should preface the link I'm about to post by saying that I am a writer, as well as a stationery business girl. I have been writing since about first grade. I don't often write science fiction, but I just happened to recently, and it dawned on me that if I wanted to submit that story to a magazine, I'd better make sure my "science" in the fiction is accurate, or at least passable for something remotely possible. So, since my story is about the affects of time being warped, I thought I'd do some research and see what others had to say about so-called "time waves," "time fields," and "time shields." To my (silly) astonishment, there *was* stuff out there with my ideas in it. What??!! You mean I'm not 100% unique in musing about time and how it might (not) work?

Stuff like this: http://johntitor.strategicbrains.com/TimeMachine.cfm.

I'm not sure whether to laugh, cry, or sit dumbfounded that, from all appearences on the website, a conversation with a supposed time-traveler from almost thirty years in the future is actually being taken seriously. I mean, I consider myself as open-minded to unusual facts of science as the next person, but come on, people …

So, back to the present.

Monday, I start work at The New Job. I'm excited and nervous, all rolled into one.

Tuesday, my parents have the final walk-through at our new house. My Little Brother goes to work.

Wednesday, my mom is driving out to my old college town to pick up my brother (the middle child) from his apartment so he can help us move. Middle Brother is 3 1/2 years younger than me, yet he is 75% through his Grad School training in Aeronautical Education. He is already a certified flight instructor with several students. He's looking for a job with a regional airline. I am in awe of my genius Middle Brother, and occasionally jealous. But I love him, and we're pretty close, and I haven't seen him since my last move, so I kinda miss him. (We shared a 2-bedroom apartment in college).

Thursday, the Guy From New Jersey who is buying our house has *his* walk-through. That evening, we will pack the moving truck, sleep on inflatable mattresses, and eat who knows what! (OK, probably pizza if my brothers have anything to say about it).

Friday, I have the day off so I can help with the move. I think I am going to end up the keeper of the animals, as we and our pets are going to be in house limbo in between closings. I will probably drive to the new house with them and try to keep the cats in the shade and my dog happy. After closing on our new home, I expect we will unpack what we can from the moving truck and either install our new refrigerator (if we have it delivered), or go buy one.

Saturday, Little Brother goes to work again, and Middle Brother drives home in his "new" car. Middle Brother's current car is what some would call a boat, otherwise known as a 1985 Mercury Grand Marquis. It has ceased to be able to drive above 55 MPH, creating some difficulty driving on any highway! He will now be the proud owner of my father's Honda Civic, which is significantly younger and in much better driving condition. (I suspect the gift of a car was my parent's bribe to get him to help us move. LOL!)

Sunday. I have no clue what will happen Sunday. We will all probably either be too exhausted to move from our (newly set-up) beds, or perhaps brave visiting a local church. We'll see.

thinking about that long commute

I found a cute Cape Cod for an absolutely incredible price not even 15 min. away from The New Job. Gorgeous inside pix with white mantle over fireplace, french doors between living and dining rooms, little "chandelier" in front foyer, and hardwood floors throughout. All this, and only a hop, skip and jump away from interstate ramp. Amazing.

Then I did my research.

Let me just say, there's reasons it's so cheap.

1) Somebody posted the inside pictures to an entirely different house on the "more pictures" tab. It's not as cute as I thought. Sure, it still has hardwood floors, but they're underneath carpet. Yep, it's a cutie, but it needs a bunch of TLC.

2) The road that runs by it is my New City's drug and prosititution corridor. Oh joy.

Serves me right for looking into buying a house before I've even started the job (or have down payment $$ saved up! It's just that I timed my commute today … and found out I had misjudged the time and distance. I'm going to have a MINIMUM of a 45 minute drive. If I actually do the speed limit, that number increases signifigantly.

*sigh*

seen on a church sign in town

"Spring … God's greeting card."

plain vanilla is a-ok with me

I went to the second interview, took a design/computer "test" in Quark, and was ushered into the VP's office by the Assistant Graphics Manager (my first interviewer) to get asked a few more questions and then, without any warning or warm-up small talk, offered the job. I accepted!

True, it's not as much as I made at my last job. I'm going to have to really get creative with my budget. But I think I'm going to enjoy working with the rest of the staff—all 7 of 'em. Met all but two yesterday.

On the way home I did a take two on my vanilla milkshake celebration. I got vanilla this time and savored every bit of it. It's kind of a metaphor for my new job, I think. I had the "strawberry" prestige job fresh out of college, but it ended up being too rich for me, with little chunks of strawberry that got stuck between my teeth and didn't taste as good as I thought it would. Now I'm going into my plain-vanilla job and, yeah, vanilla might be boring, but it's predictable and yummy. Here's to plain vanilla, as both a job and a dessert!

strawberry is NOT vanilla

The interview went well, I think. A few hours afterward I got a call from the guy I interviewed with asking me to come back for a second interview with his employers tomorrow. It's at 2:00.

I am really getting to know this city. I've already been to the library twice, and circled around downtown trying to find a parking meter that is opened. I braved a parallel park today, pulled it off perfectly, and was very pleased with myself. Now to learn which streets are one-way, which have construction, and which will be full to over-flowing during football season when a certain very popular college team begins playing again.

On the way home, I celebrated by buying a small McDonald's vanilla milkshake. As I pulled back onto the highway to drive into my town, I sipped at my shake and mused, "hmm. They must have just served a strawberry shake before I got mine. I taste strawberry."

As it turns out, there was a reason it tasted strawberry. It WAS strawberry. And I have to be really, really in the mood to buy strawberry. I wasn't. It was. I was dissapointed.

Interview!

I have an interview at the real-estate publication Wednesday at 1:00 p.m. EST!

I did a test-run today to make sure I know how to navigate the city it's in, and discovered that when the girl I talked to on the phone to get directions said, "you can't miss us, we're in the tallest building downtown," she really meant it. I was expecting some old refurbished 4-story building and ended up taking the elevator up 16 stories in a small-scale skyscraper! Whew. That was a first for me.

The offices are in a bank building, so I went to a nearby mall and picked up a nice black suit (on sale!) to wear to the interview. I might be overdressed, but I really want to make a good impression. After all, it's not everyday I have a chance to work in a building where the downstairs plaza includes a Chik-fil-A and a gym.

I am determined to be positive, self-assured, and articulate during the interview.

But, if nothing else, I had a reason to go clothes shopping for the first time in months!

The Phone Call

I was driving in town today; running errands, paying bills, etc. I picked up a map of the city I'm applying for jobs at now, so I could do some studying of the major streets and traffic patterns, and then I headed home.

I had forgotten my cell phone, so it wasn't until I got back that I found out that I had gotten a phone call from a potential employer. Talk about fast! I had only emailed my resume to them this morning. It's a layout/design job for a real estate publication. Nothing glamorous, but that's OK. I don't want glamorous. I want a salary, and benefits, and vacation time (so I can attend NSS next year, hopefully!).

I called back, and got the receptionist. My contact was in a meeting. So now I'm on pins and needles, hoping for the best, anticipating the worst. It would be great to continue working in my field, but I'm still nervous about it. I'll call again tomorrow morning, and if I get asked in to an interview, I'm going to have to drive 2 hours to get there.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch (so to speak), today was the last day for the library job application. I hope to hear from their HR department within the next week.

Whatever happens, time's a-tickin' away. In a mere 3 weeks, my family and I are moving into our new home. Maybe I'll have a new job by then, too! Maybe.

and here I thought we tried to *prevent* monopolies!

This just in: Adobe has bought Macromedia. They're saying they want Flash capabilities and are interested in mutual growth, but I personally don't see how this isn't a little too Bill Gates-ish politicking for me. After all, a buyout is the perfect silencer!

But, according to this story at Bloomberg.com, "Adobe Chief Financial Officer Murray Demo said in an interview last month there are 'too many software providers out there chasing too few dollars.' He said 'customers basically want to have fewer relationships with software vendors.'"

The article further said that "the Macromedia purchase, Adobe's biggest-ever takeover, brings together two 'complementary' products."

Ummm, let me see: what's left? A sudden coup of the QuarkXPress stronghold? Are we consumers so terribly confused that we can only buy software from a single company?

I'm insulted.

God Makes No Mistakes

I really believe this. Even when I'm about to pull out my hair in frustration, or don sackcloth and ashes in protest of my now officially two months of joblessness. Even when I get letters like this polite, hopeful, yet (if you read between the lines) firm rejection from a health-care facility that I applied to be a receptionist at, with comments by me:

Dear Ms. ______:

Thank you for your interest in career opportunities with ________ Health Systems. This letter is to inform you that your application has been received and will remain active for a period of 90 days. In the event a position comes available that match or mutual needs [note from me: this is my favorite part! Our "mutual needs!" What a way to put it! You're broke—we need slave labor, let's chat over coffee! But I digress . . . back to the letter], we will contact you for an interview [Yeah, right]. Please visit our web site (www.____________.com) for future employment opportunities. We wish you the very best in your career pursuits [since you won't get hired here anytime soon].

Sincerely,

[Signature Here]
HR/Recruiter

Oh well, they weren't high on my list of "mutual needs" anyway.

In the meantime, I truly am trying to trust that God has a plan for my career while I work at getting Ruby Red off the ground. If there is one thing I've learned in my life so far, it is that when I least understand what's going on, that's when He brings things into focus and I go, "Ohhhhhh . . . now I get it!"

better than a lemonade stand

So I did a little searching and found this game that I played when I first starting "surfing" the Internet back in 1995. It's had a bit of a face-lift over the past ten years (did we all have Java back then? I can't remember!), but it is still the smart little addictive game I remember it to be.

For the entrepreneur in all of us, it's an old-fashioned Lemonade Stand without the lemon juice stinging your eyes, and no sunscreen required! Give it a whirl!

If She Could Do It, You Can, Too

Here is the story of a young woman who started making Valentine's Day cards in the late 1800s and turned it into a $100,000 business, a very tidy sum at the time. In an age when men ruled the business world, Esther Howland's accomplishment was oustanding and nearly unheard of.

Logo Progress

Well, it was a long, late night (or should I say early morning?), but between my restless mind and the Diet Coke I had, I just finished my rough sketch of the Ruby Red logo. It has taken me nearly four months to settle on a design.

I now have a couple of to-scale comps, which I am about to begin bringing into Freehand to make into an EPS file. Now's the time I really, really wish I had a scanner, but it looks like I'm going to just have to take a trip to Kinko's. I have promised myself that as soon as I have a steady income once more, I am buying a scanner. I am!

Rain, Rain, Go Away

zoe
Originally uploaded by andregirl.

So it has been pouring all morning and afternoon. My poor Zoe girl had been tied out on the porch and I didn't notice the rain until she had already taken refuge underneath the stairs and was beginning to get quite wet. I felt horrible!

Incidentally, here she is, my pride and joy, my baby, the adorable spaniel mix princess herself, Zoe.

This picture was taken by the Humane Shelter I adopted her from, before she was Zoe. They called her Lola. I just couldn't envision myself calling, "Loooolaaaa!" every time I wanted her to come. I mean, that justs makes me think of Looney Tunes.

Dear God, Never Again

I just watched Hotel Rwanda this evening.

I didn't cry much until an hour after the credits had rolled across my television screen and then the tears slipped down my face unheeded as I realized how much I have just to be free from that kind of fear, and how little I truly know about my world.

There have been horrors before, and there will be horrors after, but I had no idea that in my lifetime nearly 1 million people could be slaughtered in the space of 100 days without so much as a tsk-tsk from the global community. Some of the most devastating footage was in the special features of the DVD, in which the real-life Paul Rusesabagina returns to the Hotel in which he saved the lives of 1200 refugees, and when he visits the memorial of a mass-grave of 45,000 people, from an attack that only 4 survived. Officials found bodies, preserved by lye. These bodies—real, not plaster—are on display on tables for visitors to the memorial to see. The machete gashes in their skulls and crushed bones of their limbs a silent testimony to the atrocities that were done to them.

I am still sick, just thinking about it.

blog stuff

I'm playing around with my blog today. See the new template? (Of course you do!) I still am dependent on Blogger for my artwork and coding, but I'm learning little by little. One day this place will really look like it should. One day!

a-choo!

*snuffle, snuffle, sniff*

Okay, this is just getting plain ridiculous. I pump myself full of Claritin, take a pain reliever or two, and I still have a horrible headache, swollen throat, fluid in the ears, and what feels like every nasal cavity ready to explode.

Ahh, Spring.

Uggh, Allergies.

Oh well, as the French say, "C'est la vie." Such is the life of a hay-fever sufferer come the prettiest months of the year. Having said this, I'm feeling a little reflective today. I have an amusing (true) anecdote or three pertaining to this topic. I will tell them in story form.

Story #1: Little Red Runny Nose

Once upon a time, there was a young girl with a very, very red nose. Nobody could figure out why. She would go outside to play under her favorite maple tree, and, invariably, every spring the effect would be the same.

"Aaaaachoooo!" she would say, "achoo!"

This happened every day, until one day, she watched a Maple flower float to the ground. "Hmm," Little Red Runny Nose said, "My what a lot of pollen you have."

"The better to tickle you with, my dear," said the Maple flower.

So, being the brilliant child she was, Little Red Runny Nose picked up the yellow Maple flower and sniffed. Bits of pollen tickled her nose. She felt an itch coming. "Aaaaaachoo!"

Little Red Runny Nose ran back inside her house. A kind mother with a box of tissues rescued the sneezy girl and tucked her up in her bed to recover, spooning Cherry-flavored Children's Benadryl into her mouth. The End.

Story #2: A (Bad) Poem About A Hike

Up the Mountain Forest we went,
Huffing,
Puffing,
Until my eyes
swolled nearly shut.
Rubbing,
Rubbing,
I tried to calm
the nagging itch
that wouldn't
go
away.
I cried; 'til
Daddy's handkerchief,
dipped in spring water,
placed across my forehead,
soothed my eyes.
I wore that handkerchief
All
The
Way
Down.

Story #3: Is it Contagious?

"I'm sorry," I said after sneezing as politely as I could, "I have hay-fever."
He looked alarmed. "Is it contagious?" he said.

Milestone #2

It's the little things in life that count …

I just made my very first product mock-ups for a line I'm developing of mini-journals and notebooks. I am very, very excited!! It feels so good to have them all neatly packaged, just like I want them to be one day soon. Granted, I used papers on hand and not the real deal, and my "labels" are hand-written, and the gold-foil "seal" is just a recycled larger sticker from a different product that I cut in two, but still!

Since they are going to be hand-bound (at least at first), I can foresee actually beginning to sell them in the next few months, once I have set up Ruby Red legally, and once I can find a wholesale paper supplier that has papers I like.

So, my current goal (other than find a job to support myself in the meantime) is to begin working on a website and promotional literature, plus finishing the plans for my upcoming lines. I am determined to have my business up and running, even a small scale, within the next six months.

But for now, I'm keeping my mockups in full sight so that every time I look at them I feel just a wee bit more encouraged.

and, since I am feeling so elated

Here's a link I got from various sources. (marketing book, college classes, online directory)

Color Marketing

I heard about these people in my Mass Communication classes several years back. They are responsible for forecasting (and thereby influencing) the trends in color for nearly all industries. If you ever wondered why once a color gets popular you see it EVERYWHERE, they're why. It's so, if you really felt led to do so, you could match your sofa slipcover's floral pattern color to your dress, which, in turn, obviously matches your new summer sandels!

You have to register for the most up-to-date forecasts (2004-2006), but 2003 is there for the looking.

Long Time No See …

The job hunt has been all-consuming. I'm over/under qualified for most of the administrative jobs, clerical jobs, medical receptionist jobs, data entry jobs, etc., etc., etc.

I've submitted resume after resume, filled out one application after another, gone to interviews, sent thank-you notes, and been filled with a sense of inadequacy, swiftly-approaching poverty, and dread.

When, oh when, will I ever save up the $$$ to start this business-o-mine? Student loans, gas, car insurance, and "break lease" payments are already eating up my tax return I got this week—the last source of income I have. It's enough to make a paper-lovin' gal throw up her hands in defeat.

I have had one positive lead for a graphic design position, but the hiring VP is out of town for a few weeks. Meanwhile, I just found another non-design job at a public library that I completely fit the qualifications for, and the pay and benefits aren't bad; it's just the commute that's killer.

I'll keep you posted, as long as I keep my sanity that long!!